Vikings Nopedy Nopes: 5 First-Rounders in a Trade, Dalton Risner, Vegan Palace

Starting OG
Former Denver Broncos offensive guard Dalton Risner on Monday Night Football during his first start with the Minnesota Vikings. U.S. Bank Stadium, October 23rd, 2023. Risner started for an injured Ezra Cleveland.

A weekend publication from VikingsTerritory, we present to you: the Vikings Nopedy Nopes of the week.

Vikings Nopedy Nopes: 5 First-Rounders in a Trade, Dalton Risner, Vegan Palace

The nopedy nopes are weekly Minnesota Vikings-themed items that we’re not buying. It’s a spin-off of our rumor mill, and we hope you enjoy. Here is the seventh batch of Vikings nopedy nopes in the series’ history.

The Nopedy Nope: The Vikings may trade five 1st-Rounders to the New England Patriots, which is allegedly their new asking price.

Vikings Nopedy Nopes
Paul Rutherford-USA TODAY Sports.

This came from NBC Sports’ Tom Curran, who covers the Patriots. New England’s asking price may allegedly approach five 1st-Rounders, a heretical sum that would almost certainly disqualify any team from executing a trade with Eliot Wolf and Co. “It’s more than three 1st-Rounders. It’s four and upwards of five. The Patriots are very much entrenched,” Curran said on NBC Sports Boston’s YouTube channel.

Curran added, “I mean, I’m just spitballing here, but they want a massive amount. You ask me what it will be. I don’t know. But I don’t think they’re going to see it for merely three. Exceed three, and maybe you can be in the conversation. Four? Will that get it done? Well, how far down the road is that next one coming?”

The Vikings probably wouldn’t spend five 1st-Rounders for the Lombardi Trophy itself. This isn’t happening and may not even be legal.

Verdict: Nopedy nope.

The Nopedy Nope: Dalton Risner will re-sign in Minnesota — per Antonio Brown.

Dalton Risner
Minnesota Vikings guard Dalton Risner addressed the media from the TCO Performance Center. Dalton Risner: “We All Know We Have A Great Culture But We Came Up Short This Season.”

Brown’s pseudo-news channel CTENews tweeted Thursday, “Sources: BREAKING NEWS. Dalton Risner will resign with the Minnesota Vikings.”

Risner and Brown share the same agent, Drew Rosenhaus, who Risner hired last month when his free agency turned stale for a second year in a row. The only problem with Risner returning to Minnesota is the source’s tweet.

Most of Brown’s tweets — especially from his personal account — are satirical and downright absurd. But occasionally, he tweets valid information, so there’s no way to determine if the Risner clue is credible or parody.

While a Risner reunion is possible, it probably would’ve happened by now, and Brown is not a credible source.

Verdict: Nopedy nope.

The Nopedy Nope: U.S. Bank Stadium is going vegan.

Brad Rempel-USA TODAY Sports.

An infamous parody account got the best of many — and made a lot of money — by spreading false information last week on Twitter and Facebook.

That’s what this account does. It’s the NFC North’s Onion. The post garnered about 4,000,000 views as of Saturday, April 20th, and the tweet had absolutely no basis in reality. It was totally made up, not even a parody of anything applicable.

The Vikings’ stadium isn’t going Vegan anything.

Verdict: Nopedy nope.

Dustin Baker is a political scientist who graduated from the University of Minnesota in 2007. Subscribe to his daily YouTube Channel, VikesNow. He hosts a podcast with Bryant McKinnie, which airs every Wednesday with Raun Sawh and Sal Spice. His MIN obsession dates back to 1996. Listed guilty pleasures: Peanut Butter Ice Cream, ‘The Sopranos,’ Basset Hounds, and The Doors (the band).

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