Wednesday, January 17, 2018

VT Question of the Week

Vikings All I Want For Christmas
Photo courtesy of Vikings.com

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!

This time of the year always seems a little brighter, doesn’t it? People are generally more upbeat with one another, offering kind salutations and a smile to encountered strangers. Nature seems more beautiful, blanketed in the pristine snow of winter, making everything look clean and pure. It’s the time of the year where you can let loose and gorge yourself on anything and everything because “you’re just going to cover it all up with a jacket anyway!” This season offers us all the opportunity to let those around us know we care about them by bestowing upon them the most incredible, perfect, this-was-made-just-for-you gift.

It truly is the most wonderful time of the year.

Or, if you’re like me, it’s getting dark way too early because of stupid daylight savings time; everyone seems incredibly irritable, rushed and annoyed with one another and would more eagerly kick a puppy than say “hello;” there is no nature covered in clean, white snow because you live in the wasteland that is Las Vegas — what inspires the holiday spirit more than sin?; it’s impossible to hide that excess belly fat because, in addition to being a wasteland, it’s still seventy degrees outside, and the opportunity to let your friends and family know you love them is really just a crushing weight on your shoulders to make sure you buy them the most incredible gift — forcing you to brave the catastrophe of hordes of people in the same exact situation and spirit as you at the local shopping hub.

Who’s ready for the holidays?! (Okay, yeah – I can be kind of a Scrooge sometimes.)

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Image courtesy of Vikings.com

It is now or never for the Minnesota Vikings and their 2016 playoff chances. Every remaining game this season is a must-win for the Vikings, even this Sunday against the 2-10 Jacksonville Jaguars.

At first glance, this seems like an easy win for Minnesota as the Jaguars have not won a game since Week 6. But this is the Vikings we are talking about and anyone who has spent more than a second rooting for this team knows that almost anything is capable of happening when Minnesota takes the field.

Besides preventing head coach Mike Zimmer from tearing his other eye out this weekend, there are a few things that the Vikings should emphasize in order to ensure a better outcome than what Hillary Clinton had in the state of Florida back in November.

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Dak Hunting Season
Image courtesy of Vikings.com

Is it just me or has this season become so excruciatingly painful, so categorically absurd, so anti-Vegas that it has actually become kind of funny?

I mean, the Minnesota Vikings’ injury virus has stretched all the way to its head coach — not even the kerfuffle of Green Bay fans suffering from that horrible loser denial bug (that seemingly decided to set up camp and raise a rather large family in the southwestern quadrant of the Midwest) can say their head honcho was forced to sit out a game in order to receive his (Guinness world record-breaking) 27th eye treatment of the year.

Minnesota, which was subsequently led into battle by special teams coach Mike Priefer and oft-ridiculed defensive coordinator George Edwards, came within one quarter, 15 minutes, two yards — er, seven — and a coin flip win of upending the class of the NFC only to melt like a popsicle — left unguarded by its protective wrapper — resting atop a jet-black rural Birmingham, Ala. rooftop smack dab in the middle of July while Vin Diesel unleashes a blitzkrieg of unforgiving heat from an LPO-50 flamethrower constructed in the Soviet Union circa 1950 for the sole purpose of destruction by combustion.

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Minnesota Vikings-Jacksonville Jaguars

At the quarter pole, the Minnesota Fightin’ Vikings are in full win-or-die mode as they enter Week 14. Mike Zimmer returns to the team after missing the Dallas game due to emergency surgery on his retina and hopes to rally the Purple for one gallant rush towards the postseason. To chew the fat, I brought in my man Luke Inman to the Blue Door Pub to run through what the Vikes need to do to make chicken salad out of 2016.

All that and more “STUFF THE BALLOT BOX FOR TJ” chatter on this edition of the Purple FTW! Podcast!

An Andy Carlson Joint

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